Whole 30 Days Two and Three: Pinch My Fat OR How To/To Not Dine Out

Welcome to Days Two and Three. You are still riding those sugary carb stores and your body hasn’t noticed that you are about to throw it into the dietary equivalent of an icy Lake Michigan. Life is good. You might have a headache, but you have had those before. Don’t worry, it get’s much worse. Enjoy these simple times. Let’s talk dining out and dining in.

Sidebar: Allow me to launch into a totally inappropriate dialogue. I used to wonder why all these other bloggers called it “Dining Out”–I mean, who says that? “Oh Ted, I am feeling famished…shall we dine out this chilly eve?” Uh…hello..don’t we just say eating out? Wait. No, we don’t. I realized that as soon as I typed it into the title of this blog. We don’t type the words “Eating Out” in reference to eating at a restaurant because…well…ya know. Vagina.


Day Two: How To Dine Out

When you are at a restaurant, just be that person. Ask what oil they use, where they source their ingredients, and what-the-hell creamed greens are. I have eaten at Wendy’s successfully on a Whole 30–so trust me, it is possible to eat almost anywhere.

So, brunch was good. Next came my baseline fitness and body fat test. This meant a half-Cindy, which is As-Many-Rounds-As-Possible of 5 pullups, 5 pushups and 5 squats for 10 or 20 minutes. It also meant Body Fat Testing with skin calipers. I also did before photos. I will post all of this at the end of my Whole 30.

Day Two is otherwise always easy for me, so let’s skip to Day Three. Day Three was easy. Yoga, brunch again..but then came…Meal Prep (or How To Not Dine Out).

Day Three: How To *Not* Dine Out

Listen to me when I say this, Whole 30-ers: YOU MUST MEAL PREP. You must. You will be hangry all the time if you don’t. Your boyfriend, your kids, your pets…they will all suffer if you do not food prep. And, your success rate with the program will plummet if you don’t food prep. SO PREP THOSE MEALS.

Yes, it takes hours and hours. And, yes, your kitchen looks like this halfway through:

FoodSplosion!! WHAMMMOOOO!

But, I am telling you that it is worth it. Because, when you get home after your long day the last thing you want to do is cook, right? You just steam a bland, chewy chicken breast and some broccoli and grab a handful of almonds and wish that it was day 29 of the Whole 30.

When you meal prep, you can make big batches of interesting, nutritious food and you cut down on food waste. So, you end up with this:

IMG_20150104_205132 IMG_20150104_210423

Now, isn’t that more appealing than a floppy chicken breast? Yes. It. Is. I will link some recipes at the bottom.

If you have tried this before, you know that it is time consuming. And overwhelming. So, let me share my fabulous list of…

Five-Not-So-Tricky-Tricks of Meal Prepping

1. Buy containers. I like these Reditainer containers, available on Amazon.com. They come in a lot of sizes, are freezer safe, microwaveable and BPA free. And if I misplace one, it was only a dollar. You cannot use them in the oven–but you already cooked this stuff! You are reheating it!

2. Choose meals that have common ingredients. This is the most important thing I do. I look for recipes that have common vegetables, spices and cooking methods. This saves time in prep work and is way easier on your brain. Again, recipes I used will be linked at the bottom.

3. Make a list. I am pretty sure that if there was a television show that was only about making lists, I would watch it. My idea of a good porno would be Robert Downey, Jr making a list. That’s it. That is all I need. Maybe with a glass of bourbon. But, I can’t have that right now. So, just Iron Man…making a list. With a fancy pen.

First, take stock of what you have at home (duh). Then, your list should ideally be divided into sections of the grocery store, list quantity for each item and also be coded by meal to make the prep easier. This is what my lists look like:


4. Start Cooking! Take that list, pull everything out and divide it. Maybe even make another list that tells you what time to start cooking things and *be still my heart* even what ingredients get what prep. The list tells you how everything gets organized and saves your brain a lot of work when you start cooking and portioning out.

5. Storing It. Portion and let everything cool in the containers on the counter for a bit. If you are freezing them, let them cool in the fridge overnight before freezing. It will reheat more evenly.

Other things to keep on hand/prepped:

  • Fruit (but this is not an every-meal-sub-for-dessert thing)
  • Cashews, Pistachios (you will get sick of almonds and they aren’t even the best nut!)
  • Whole 30 compliant jerky
  • Frozen veggies (seriously, stock the fuck up) to toss into scrambled eggs, etc
  • Eggs (hard boiled….the right way…so you don’t peel away half the egg
  • Cans of coconut milk and tubs of coconut oil and ghee
  • Coconut Aminos
  • Herbal teas

Things that seem like a good idea to keep on hand, but are actually pretty awful:

  • Larabars and Kit’s Bars. Your body doesn’t know the difference between these fruit-sugary treats. Your headache and cravings will never go away if you eat these. And they have basically zero protein.
  • Fruit Juice. Empty. Calories. Ditto what I said above.

Well, those are my tips for today! I cannot promise the next post will be as cheerful. I am entering Day 4…which is the start of #KillAllTheThings. For those of you who want to try the recipes I used, here ya go. You will notice a lot of cauliflower, mixed veggies, a variety of protein and lots of color…Enjoy!


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